this past week was hard. to be totally honest, i haven't felt such lows since moving here. the house was (& still is) a disaster & i couldn't come up with one ounce of motivation to do much of anything. it is a tough reminder when you realize you are only human & really need a community to live life fully. once you move away from that community, life downright sucks sometimes. also, having a bright red kitchen & dining room doesn't help much either. so i painted with my mom & brother. & it was just what i needed to bring me back. that green really speaks to me.

luke & i also made a trip to his family's home for the goodness of comfort from such a hard week. we made a date of it, too, & had breakfast at brick house kitchen & a late morning of purchasing fresh foods from the farmer's market. fennel & bowls of heirloom tomatoes- so good.

we had such good conversations with luke's mom. just the right amount of clarity to keep you going even in the junk of life.

we headed back & spent sunday at our home-in-the-making. the garden is beginning to feel just right.

basil soaking up every bit of the summer heat

& our first sighting of tomatoes.

of course, things still aren't peachy & every single day i am reminded of the process of living, but these little meltdowns are reminding me that i am growing & learning. just knowing that is reassuring.



bridgmanpottery said...

it's unfortunate that growth comes with pains. right there with you. but I feel the tide turning, and I hope you do, too, this week.

ALFIE said...

these pictures are oh-so-lovely. you will find your nitch in the new place. time has a way of bringing everything full circle.

that fennel picture is amazing!

Luke Freeman said...

Natalie, you are being so strong. I think you are doing well to stop and look around at the beauty that surrounds us and the joyful moments we've experienced. I know we can make it here. And we'll come out of it wiser, stronger, and more seasoned.

By the way, I love your fennel and tomato pictures. They're great.


bright lights, big cities said...

you'll find your way soon! i know exactly how you're feeling (in fact, I still have break downs every now and then!)

I will also have to send you a wonderful fennel recipe (gotta love fresh fennel!)

like i ALWAYS say 'love what is ahead by loving what has come before' .... (from yogi tea..)

Darcy said...

This is lovely and completely relate-able. I too moved to the country recently (I'm actually just on the other side of the Ouachita Mountains from you) & not having that constant community of people who care about you has been the biggest struggle. Its hard to motivate yourself when there aren't others there to also be motivated.

A garden with my beau definitely helps though. :)

onelonelyapricot said...

Natalie, it was very difficult for me as well when I moved from the city where I went to undergrad. I felt I had worked so hard to build a community around me there, and it was hard to give that up. But you seem like the delightful kind of person that is able to build that wherever you go, it just always takes longer than we'd like. Thinking of you as you experience huge life transitions!

01 09 10 11 12
Blogging tips